Being Dead Sucks

A woman had a lousy marriage with a rich and mean man, but one day he dies. He was cremated and after all was settled she came home and began pouring the ashes on the counter. She talked to the ashes as she poured them out.

"Remember that diamond ring you always promised me and never bought? I just bought one with your money!"

She continued on, "And remember that fancy sports car you talked about getting me but never did? I just bought it with your money."

A smile crossed her face as she finished, "And remember that blow job I promised you? Here it comes!"