Free Drinks

Lou and Larry were a pair of winos. They woke with the shakes one afternoon and realized they had only one dollar between them. Lou began to get worried, but Larry told him, "Lou, just relax. Give me the one dollar we do have and I will show you how we can drink for free all day long." So Larry went to a hot dog stand and bought one weiner for the buck, and he stuck it into Lou's pant's fly,

Next, they went into the nearest bar and ordered drinks. After a few rounds the bartender asked for his money, and at that point Larry dropped down to his knees, unzipped Lou's fly, and began vigorously sucking on the hot dog wiener. The bartender screamed, "Get out of my bar you freaking queers," and tossed them out of the place.

Lou and Larry repeated this scheme for much of the day, strolling from bar to bar, but after a dozen bars Larry said, "Lou, this was a great idea but I gotta stop for a while, my knees are getting sore from hitting the floor."

Lou shook his head. "You should complain," he said. "How you think I feel. We lost the hot dog after the second bar."