Screaming Drunk

A drunk got up from the bar and headed for the bathroom. A few minutes later there was a blood curdling scream coming from the bathroom.

Just a moment later the scream echoed through the bar again. The bartender goes to the men's room to investigate why the drunk man is screaming.

"What is all the screaming in here about?" the bartender yells. "You're scaring all the customers."

"Well, I'm just sitting here and taking a crap," the drunk slurs, "and every time I flush your damn toilet something reaches up and squeezes my damn balls really hard!"

The bartender opens the stall door and peeks in and says, "You idiot, you are sitting on the mop bucket."